Loss and Love

Since I eagerly and enthusiastically write about the animals coming to join us at Cheyne Ranch, does this mean I also write an update when animals leave Cheyne Ranch? One through needing a new home and one through reaching life's final chapter, I’m thinking about 2 animals who left Cheyne Ranch this week. While processing the sadness, I’m also full of appreciation for the community of animal experts and friends that surround us, who are willing to be kind, supportive and helpful especially when we need it the most.

First: Scarlett

Oh this beautiful horse that I loved so immediately. I fell hard and fast for this horse - because she is so pretty, because she is a little fiesty and because she is picky about who her human is. Scarlett’s personality reminds me of a younger version of Lujen who has all those same traits. However, what she doesn’t have is Lujen’s old-man teddy bear personality who accepts everyone’s love and affection, because that is his main job, to accept the adoration of our guests. My friend and horse trainer, Chezzy, took Scarlett for the past couple weeks to provide his own evaluation and some training. The verdict: Scarlett is super beautiful, what a wonderful horse! But, she is just a little too young (she is 12, Lujen is almost 22), and a little too feisty for her job to be so chill everyday. She will be much happier (and much more useful) in a barn where she can be utilized in a more active way. Robin Cyr (Scarlett’s owner) is super gracious and is finding her a perfect home soon.

Second: Frankie

When we moved to our property in the summer 2016, a Florida gopher tortoise was living in our front yard, they claimed squatter’s rights, and remained here the past 4.5 years to the delight of my family and many of our guests. We named her Francesca, Frankie for short and I think the horses liked her too. Frankie hasn’t been moving too much lately, and I messaged my friend and neighbor, Ariel, to come over. (Side note: Ariel wrote her master’s thesis on gopher tortoise respiratory infections!) Sadly, Ariel took one look and knew Frankie was already gone. As a wildlife specialist, she collected Frankie and (thankfully) took her to a professional who is going to keep Frankie's shell for educational purposes. I miss you already Frankie.

Frankie bit the dust.

Scotty tribute

Our friend Scotty came to live on our property in August. He passed away on Friday, November 20th at 2:22 in the afternoon. I shared my thoughts on Facebook and since he (and his dogs) were such a big part of Cheyne Ranch these past few months, I am sharing my post here on this blog too.

Most of us Oviedens (oh-vee-EY-dens) know of Scott's passing, I appreciate Melissa's update posts on Scotty and I'm so thankful for Melissa and also Scotty's daughter, Lindsay, who are carrying the bulk of the weight dealing with the details of his life and death. Scotty has an entire community of support and love surrounding him, and that is primarily the same community of people that I love, all because Melissa welcomed us both in, sharing this incredible fellowship that she & Allen built naturally and continue to extend.

That is actually the bond that Scotty and I share most deeply, our gratitude for having a place to go where our friends gathered, and a place we felt we belonged. I met Scotty just over 4 years ago and it was mutual love & trust by association, we both loved Melissa, so that was that. It was an easy friendship right from the start. I don't remember too much time ever passing between our ongoing conversations, reaffirming our gratitude and his proud sense of purpose being part of this community.

Scotty worked for us (Cheyne Ranch) for 5 months during the second half of 2018, in the barn and around our property. He was this amazing guy who knew "everything" (except when he needed to consult with Allen), and was willing to work on anything. I was working from home as a software instructor at the time and he'd walk in my office and say, "I know you are so working, so I won't bother you for long..." and somehow it always became a long, lovely discussion about anything and everything really. Scotty (and me) certainly know how to talk. He drove Evan & Sophia to school those months, and they ran to his truck with big smiles and he greeted them the same. He took that job so seriously, he was 15 minutes early every single day! And he usually sent some ridiculously covert operation text letting me know "the goods were delivered" and the volume during transport wasn't too loud

When he moved to our property because he was getting sick this past August, we talked about how he would get better and just work for Cheyne Ranch, because working for "the man" (corporations) was not something he wanted to do again. I had a feeling his time here was shorter than he planned, but I'm not sure anyone (even Scott) knew just how fast-moving his cancer really was. He talked about getting better after he recovered from the radiation treatment and all of the wildlife photographs he wanted to take and how he wanted to teach my kids how to scuba dive and shoot a gun.

All 4 Cheyne kids love Scotty, and his dogs. Evan & Sophia, even Anna & Graci take his dogs out, feed them, and clean up after the dogs and inside Scotty's place. Several evenings, they would walk Scotty back to his place, to make sure he made it back safely. The last night Scott was at our house, Sophia saw him walking around the yard and went and held him, arm and arm and walked him home. Later that at night, he and I spent a long time talking. I remember asking if he was in pain and for the first time in months he shook his head and said, "not really, I got the good stuff, want some?" He showed me one of his nifty flashlights that plugs in! and, btw, can be used as a weapon of needed. We talked about how he (reluctantly but gratefully) agreed to move into Melissa's guest room soon, as in the next day. But! just to fatten him up - and not on the weekend! He said, "my mind doesn't want to (leave his dogs) but my body can't do it anymore (live alone) so there's no more arguing about it."

The next morning I checked on Scott, he had not answered my text or Melissa's phone call. I did that loud knock announcing myself then opened the door. He responded to me! I had such relief for just a split second. My sweet husband had followed me out, and he heard us talking and thought everything was fine too. We made some initial joke (was I busting in on him indecent? ) But his head was leaning over and he wouldn't straighten it out. I asked him if he was having a stroke and he said, "eh? I don't think so." I told him I was calling an ambulance for him, then continued asking him if that was ok? I was expecting him to protest and tell me he was actually super pissed at me and he was fine. It turns out it wasn't a stroke, but he definitely was not ok. The paramedics knew pretty quick they were assessing a man in respiratory failure. Melissa (with Bob and Jill visiting too) was at his side moments later and in the hospital for the next 15 hours!! making sure he was never alone. I was attempting COVID cautiousness (getting tested), feeling like a drug seeker begging for antibiotics for what I knew was my own respiratory infection, and ensuring his daughter Lindsay arrived in town.

For the night I did spend by his side in the ICU, I'm so grateful for that awful bipap machine, which helped his CO2 levels calm down enough so he had several lucid, touching, and, of course, hilarious moments. A few of those moments are probably best kept out of public consumption, but I hope I will write some of them down sometime soon. At one point we were laughing so loud the nurse came over and closed the door. When I dozed off and awoke to him awake too, I said, oh hell, did my snoring wake you up? He said "no (super lie) try to go back to sleep." I said ummmmm... No you are the one who needs to be sleeping! I'm pretty sure he went back to sleep. My overwhelming thought that night was, I'm the lucky one who gets to be here with Scott right now.

Friday afternoon when I joined Melissa and Lindsay at his bedside in the hospital, I just kept thinking how lucky I was to know him, how lucky the 3 of us are to be at his side (during a pandemic!) and how lucky he is pass so peacefully, surrounded by such an outpouring of love.