Defining Love and (not so randomly) understanding more about Equine Therapy
I am not a therapist - maybe someday I will be. However, I do have 4 children and my mission as their mother is to provide them the tools so they can be their best selves. Come to think of it, my mission for my own self is to continue developing skills that make me the best version of myself. The same can be said of all my primary relationships, my definitive reason for being in those relationships is to help others and myself continue growing and learning.
I think this is the true definition of love, helping ourselves and others become the best version we can be. A book I read as a young adult defined love in a way that has stuck with me all these years:
“The will to extend oneself for the purpose of nurturing one's own or another's spiritual growth. Genuine love is volitional rather than emotional. The person who truly loves does so because of a decision to love.”
The Road Less Traveled: A New Psychology of Love, Traditional Values and Spiritual Growth by M. Scott Peck 1978
Of course, I’m a completely failing human much of the time, so I am not always operating, in fact, probably rarely, in “growth mode.” But this brings me to horses, and caring for horses, and why I am passionate about sharing the experience of caring for horses and being in their presence:
Because the skills we develop to best care for and be present with the horse are the same skills that help make us better people!
The infographic below illustrates this in terms of Equine Therapy:
Here is a link to an excellent article summarizing what Equine Therapy is, who it may benefit and what the benefits are. I am so passionate about developing the skills mentioned in this article because whether I had horses or not, these are the skills I want my loved ones and I to keep improving!
One key takeaway from the article I have is:
Equine-assisted psychotherapy is often not the sole form of treatment, but rather a complementary therapeutic service to be used in partnership with more traditional treatment.
Something I didn’t understand about Equine Therapy for a long time was if being around horses is so therapeutic, why do we still encounter so many unhealthy people in the profession / industry. The answer (I’m learning) is simply being around horses isn’t some magic potion to a zen state of mind. Quite the contrary actually, anyone with the means (some land maybe, or the means to rent the stall or land) can buy, inherit or adopt a horse. But owning a horse is expensive, complex and potentially dangerous - which can all be very stressful. And being in the industry, most jobs are unregulated, meaning anyone can call themselves a “horseman or woman,” “horse trainer, “horseshoer / farrier", “horse masseuse,” etc. So there are lots of people who are horse owners, or involved in the equine industry in some way, who are ill-equipped to handle the complexities, danger and expenses. Which generally leads to their stress and underlying anger / frustration / denial or fear being on constant display.
The good news is, the opposite is also true. Putting in the time and effort to develop a trusting relationship with the horse brings big reward. The rewards include being present with a horse and the horse trusts the person so both the horse and person share a moment of shared time and space together. Also the reward of achieving a particular goal while riding or walking the horse, whether it is a stroll through nature, a ride to strengthen one’s core muscles, or to walk a special needs client on the horse so they too can experience the thrill - these are all inherent rewards that come from a successful trusting partnership developed between horse and human. Achieving this partnership requires the presence of emotional control, awareness, confidence, calmness and lots of coping and problem solving along the way. We (I) can always keep improving these skills.
Let’s spend that time together, with the horses and work towards mastering these skills. We can all work together for ourselves and for each other. There is no better motivator, coach and reflective partner than a horse.
Body clipping
We are moving into our 4th Florida fall & winter season with horses in our barn, and this is our first time attempting to "clip" them (shave / trim their heavy coats). It's been mixed results, I'm still pretty sure there's horse hair in my eye…
More scarlett
She is lovely! Half arabian, half trakehner, born on May 26, 2008. Welcome to the herd Scarlett!
Welcome Scarlett
I woke up this morning like a kid on Christmas morning! I have been so excited to welcome this lovely mare to Cheyne Ranch! Scarlett is such a beautiful warmblood / arab cross. She has been a mama for 2 babies the last 3 years, and we are going to slowly (slowly) see if she wants to join our horse lovin' nature therapy program here at Cheyne Ranch. Thank you to Robin Cyr @cyrpointstable for allowing us the chance to love on Scarlett. Thank you to Lauren @pitchforkprincess for transporting her for us <3 <3
Scarlett arrived at Cheyne Ranch on October 22, 2020 from Cyr Point Stables. She is a registered Arabian / Trakehner cross and has a famous grandfather named Bask. Her coloring is called dappled grey. From 2016 - 2020, she has delivered and raised 2 babies. Scarlett was born on May 26, 2008 in Wellborn, FL.
Luna Lovegood loves chasing bubbles
This is adorable… Luna loves chasing bubbles. It is hard to believe this dog is 5 years old! Even harder to believe she is so recently recovered from what should have been a life-ending accident. This dog is really living her best life.
August September Break
After our 2 back-to-back camp weeks in August, we needed a break. A break from the blazing Florida heat in August. It was a record breaking August. We closed Cheyne Ranch to (most) customers. We enjoyed a few families who visit regularly, and we hosted a few birthday parties as well.
Here are two 90 second video I made recapping our August and September:
Summer Camp
We had 4 weeks of summer camp this summer at Cheyne Ranch. They were so fun. And it was so hot! I want to remember so much of the fun-ness: It was COVID-19 summer, so we washed hands a lot, and tried to stay a little distant from one another (that didn’t really work). We didn’t wear face masks and we didn’t think much about COVID-19 at all. I got tested a couple times to make sure I was ok, and each test came back negative.
UPDATE: It is 8 weeks since week 4 of summer camp ended, and I never did hear of any campers or their families experiencing COVID. We went on daily nature walks, kids took turns sitting on the horses, a couple of the weeks, we made folders with a summary of all we learned.
We had field trips and guest speakers. We went to Green Acres Farm, we visited the pond at my friend Gary & Lidia’s house, my neighbor Ariel came and educated us about her rescue animals, Chaz gave us a reptile seminar about gopher tortoises, Dennis the bee guy came to us, Daryl and Bill, each amazing farriers each came and gave presentations.
We at lunch at the picnic table on the playground and the kids played on the playground. We had water days in our pool, slip-n-slides, and a HUGE slide was rented by our friends at the Florida Inclusion School. We painted ponies and braided their mane and tails. We did some crafts, tie-dyed shirts and hung out in the bunny zen room. We walked the horses and spent extra time grooming them and getting horse rides.
We had as many middle and high school volunteers as we did campers. Our helpers were Anna, Sophia, Evan, Jessica, Preston, Jenine, Brynn, Hunter, Jackson, Elysia, Katelyn & CJ. We had between 7 and 10 campers. We met from 9:00 AM - 1:00 PM Monday - Friday for the week.
Pearl busted a water pipe in the barn while getting painted, and 1 camper broke her collarbone. We were never rained out for an entire camp day, just a few minutes, maybe an hour total of rain. Our tack room was (mostly) clean and air conditioned, so the kids spent time in there cooling off for a few minutes, especially during the August weeks. All in all it was an amazing experience.
There are literally almost 1000 photos of the 4 weeks, so I attempted to choose some highlights:
2020 Summer Camp @ Cheyne Ranch
I want love
Do you know this Elton John song, well the video actually, where Rob Lowe lip syncs to the powerful lyrics that is a super basic drive in all of us? I want love is the name of it. I was thinking about this song as I observed the following shenanigans over the course of the past 36 hours:
